Who is with me if you are struggling with your child when teaching them your native or a second language at home! I was born in NYC and raised by two Spanish-speaking parents. There was no option for me to speak with them in English as my parents did not speak English. In addition to having a strong foundation at home, I traveled to Dominican Republic (DR) at least once a year until I was in college and spent my summers with family. My camp was going to DR and experiencing our beautiful culture for a few months out of the year where there was no English being spoken. For me, speaking Spanish meant embracing my family and my roots, I loved it and it was cool to switch from one language to another! I was fortunate my parents where able to send me and I took advantage of all that was offered to me.
Today, I struggle in doing the same for my children. Regardless of how much I speak to them in Spanish, they know I can speak English and prefer to speak the language they feel more comfortable with. It is important to me, I want my children to be bilingual, it is such a great asset they will have for life. I will share what happened to me and hope that the below tips are helpful for you. When my first son started speaking in sentences, he was going to a Jewish School at the time, speaking Spanish and English at home and learning Hebrew in school. He was Tri-lingual for a short time in his life. Parents, I have to confess, I know when my mistake started and you will know what I mean when I explain. When your baby starts speaking full sentences, the cuteness just MELTS you away, you are so HAPPY, they sound so ADORABLE, it is just a happy time in the toddler life, they can finally communicate with you! As my heart was filled with sweetness, HOW COULD I STOP the flow? When he spoke to me in English, I responded in English, this became a habit and there you have it… That was when the English language took over. I still spoke Spanish but the main language became English and it was the one we were perfecting together. So this is where it all started and my struggle in teaching him Spanish just became harder, there wasn't a balance, it just took over. It continued onto my second son as well, I went back to work and had to put him in daycare, where the main language spoken by the teachers and staff was English.
One thing I do know, it sure does take a lot of discipline unless you have help that is reinforcing the language. I have friends where one parent speaks in one language and the other in English and the children are fluent. I have friends that the child knows three languages and they do it. I commend them, I applaud them, it is empowering that their children are able to speak two and three languages. I am a believer, where there is consistency and persistence with your children and their routines, things work. Whatever it is you are trying to do, it will work. However, when you are not consistent in your routines it becomes a challenge and very difficult to accomplish. It takes the most discipline from you as the parent, that is the key, WE HOLD THE POWER. I know it is so hard, we have so much on our plate but you know it is possible, there are children that are able to speak 2, 3, even 4 languages. The truth is and I am finding this after baby number 3, we just CAN’T GIVE UP! CONSISTENCY IS KEY.
As they say "third time is a CHARM," I only speak Spanish to my smallest, I do not give her the option to speak in English and I can tell you she only speaks Spanish to me, sometimes she will slip in an English word and I repeat it in Spanish. She does see that my boys speak English, she hears me speaking to them and they speak English to her, she is now watching TV mostly in Spanish but some English. I speak English to others so she is exposed to the two languages everyday, but I only speak Spanish to her and it is working, so far so good she is developing into a BILINGUAL child and I hope that my kids will continue understanding the importance and not resist so that in the future they can be bilingual.
It is a working progress Moms and Dads, DO NOT GIVE UP. I decided to be more disciplined about my children learning Spanish, they have improved and they are embracing it and proud to be learning the language. So don't give up because I WILL NOT. We all have reasons for doing what we do, no one is perfect and as parents we do what we can, do what you can.
One important tip I can provide is to expose your children to the language every chance you get. This is easier today with all the technology and options that exist for us. For instance watching TV is a simple one. My toddler is watching more movies now and we purchase many movies on Apple TV and Amazon Prime. I change the audio to Spanish for the movies that have the option on Apple TV. Amazon Prime has many options for children. You can purchase channels from your country via a cable provider, also through your cable provider you can change language preferences for movies. You can look for videos on YouTube Kids with your language preference. Purchase books and toys in your native language, look for options on Amazon or Google.
The important thing is to continue to make progress and focus on actively teaching your children to speak the language, whatever language you want them to learn. Just continue to speak it; it will stick one way or another.
See link below on how to change the audio in Apple TV, for me this is AWESOME;
Diana Duran